A few messages to give out...

To the middle aged harridan behind me in the supermarket queue yesterday - nudging my basket out of the way, tutting under your breath and trying to edge me along with your basket will only ever make me go even slower to spite you. Why not spend the few seconds waiting time by preparing the exact amount of change you need, instead of causing a hold up behind you as you dig silver out of your louis vuitton purse with gnarled claws?...

To the nishitetsu bus driver last night - kudos to you sir. Despite being held up by traffic and then being thwarted all the way by death defying Japanese motorists, you managed to knock a full 3 minutes off the journey time and afforded me the luxury of the early train home. Thank you, sincerely.

To the middle aged man that I sat next to on the train tonight - how terrible it must have been to have to sit next to a foreigner for 15 minutes. Perhaps that was why you had a face like Donald Rumsfeld chewing a wasp, and why you kept sighing as if on stage. You're lucky I didn't have a tissue on me, else I'd have blown my nose loudly and dropped the sopping tissue in your lap. Arrogant arse.